Building your network and communication skills

Do you recall your time attending a company meeting, participating in a brainstorming session or sitting in a classroom where people talked over one another constantly?

You would probably be able to hear them clearly, if you talked less and listened more. However, I've noticed that even people who've attended, held executive roles or hosted all three, still may have not mastered effective communication.

Would you believe me if I stated that I experienced all three in each event listed above? I can admit to being one of those people who wanted to get my point across, by strongly voicing my opinions or just listening while quietly disagreeing. Now, I know that it was not the best way of communicating, that took me time to figure out. What I didn't realize at first is that, not having an open-mind, and selfishly dismissing the opinions of others could effect my relationships with some.

The same applies when networking - 

In order to build better networking and communication skills you must be willing to listen to others to the end of the conversation. You may find that at the end of your conversation when meeting some one new that there is a need to connect. You may also realize that you have no need to connect professionally with someone but that they might be a great referral for you or vice versa.

People would probably say that you're faking it, I strongly disagree. The first initial meeting is your opportunity to learn as much as you can about that individual. There may be instances where you have to speak with a person two or three times to see if you are able to help or exchange services. A person can easily assume that you have no interest in their service or business if they never asked. On the flip side if you never ask me about my business or services that I offered and assume that you don't need them then that is a example of broken communication.

Be selective with your connections, make sure that the person who is trying to connect with you can discuss their business and services specifically. You want to have valuable connection, that you can not only use for yourself but pass on to others. If they can't explain their business, then surely they will not be able to.

I hope that you will practice listening more, not making assumptions and asking more about someone and their business in order to build a stronger network.

- Mrs. N.B.S

"Recreating your networking approach"

When I discovered my passion

Some people say that your life really starts after college; others say after building a family and of course it could be at any one of those moments or after.

For me, everything began two years after college. I was single, getting out of relationship that was toxic, living in my second apartment and working a full-time position in higher education. My apartment was a small studio, with a walk-in closet that I loved. It was the best bachelorette pad, I guess that's the best way to refer to it. As a women, I feel that I can speak on the behalf of others when it comes to the phase "never having anything to wear" we tend to look in our closet and have a room full of clothes but it never seems as if there is enough options for us to select from.

 If you're a shoe fanatic than you could agree that the same applies. I dressed up for work everyday but once the weekend came around I didn't really have much to wear. I stopped buying jeans while replacing them with dress pants and starting purchasing blouses in place of t-shirts. Note to self: Keep your t-shirts, they are so useful in the winter and the summer. I planned on going out with my girlfriends one weekend and realized I had no casual shirts. That prompted me to go to Target; while in Target I couldn't make up my mind so I decided to look up online how to make one. After I made my first shirt, I decided to order me a screen printer which wasn't the best but it worked good enough to get the job done. It doesn't sound too appealing, I know.

However, I decided to design them online utilizing various printing companies and I sold them for a year. After leaving the position, I started working a new position that took up most of my time. I realized that having my own business was my dream. I don't regret taking that position but I do regret not taking time out to learn how to balance between the two. My whole point to this and that you can do whatever you desire. Although, I made some mistakes during that time period my desire to be a business owner never left. It actually changed from just being a clothing designer to becoming an educational advocate for the community. It became greater than I imagined and even greater than me. You need to know that you are not perfect and that it's okay if you veer off track. Sometimes you have to take the long road so that you can truly see your purpose and live the life that you always thought that you could.

Best,

- From Mrs.N.B.S

Should networking always be fun?

The other day, I sat and networked with an inspiring group of women. We are talking about mothers, wives, daughters, sisters and friends all together, discussing natural hair. You know what happens when you put nothing but sisters in one room, they're clowning, cracking jokes and they are more then willing to share their bad hair day experiences.

To fast-forward towards the end of the meeting, I had a mother tell me right before leaving that she did not like social networking. I paused in my steps, because at that moment I knew why my passion to share and educate others on professional networking was so important. She had no idea that she was already networking and had been doing so for years; within that group of amazing women.

It's important that we understand that social and professional networking is two different things. However, networking is communicating and connecting with a group of individuals with the purpose of furthering your career or enhancing your business. You should never look to network with people if you are not looking to gain knowledge, tools, a position, friendships, clients and etc. That does not mean that it can't be fun, it just means that you must do it with purpose.

There will be moments when you have to attend a conference, an executive meeting, there may be a moment where you're attending an after seven event which is more casual. It can be in passing at an art gallery, a comedy show case or on-set for a movie. My point is that you can connect with people anywhere but you must be excited and always hopeful about it because you never know what may come out of it. Networking will not always be fun but it is always necessary.


Be blessed and inspired on today,


Mrs. N.B.S

The Clique Vs. The Network

On today, I was reminded that often times we have individuals that prefer to be in cliques instead of being a part of a network. Now, I will get more in depth on my thoughts concerning this but here is the difference between the two.

"Clique" - A small group of people, with shared interests or other features in common, who spend time together and do not readily allow others to join them.

Source - Google

The key words here is do not readily. If you plan to have a private, uninviting group that focuses on appearances, comfort-based off on purely who you know and what you know then that is NOT a network.

"Network" - A group or system of interconnected people or things. Interconnected refers to those who are all connected.

Source - Google

The meanings and differences sound pretty accurate to me. I can't speak for you or anyone else but networking sounds much more attractive to me.

- This can be concerning when referring to cliques formed in an office setting or where individuals are motivated to build a professional leadership group. I can speak from my own personal experiences that becoming or being a part of a clique is something that you might want to avoid. If you desire the ability to form a successful networking partnership then you need to be open to meeting new people who have that objective at heart. Being a part of a clique happens often in work environments and that can stir up a lot of tension amongst co-workers, whether it be departmental or interdepartmental. Save your time and energy for producing quality work, building strong relationships, earning the trust of your co-workers and upper management. 

Managers be advised that you create the environment in which your employees will demonstrate professionalism and increase morale. You are the example. What you start will be what you have to finish and will be purely a representation of you.

That doesn't mean that you shouldn't be weary of those that you attach your name and brand too when building your networking circle. You have the advantage, communicate with them so that the relationship can thrive and grow. If someone has already made up their mind about you then they will automatically reject you or any information that you have to offer. Be open to the people that you come into contact with, you never know what type of skills or experience they may have. It's just like they say "Never judge a book by it's cover," you must always be willing to read the story. Ask specific questions and understand that you may not agree with what they have to say but realize that you have started a lane for communication with them. 

You have more influence over a person when your are more receptive to listening to them then rejecting them. I prefer to be the go-to person and not be the person to watch out for, There will be a time where you will need assistance from someone outside of your clique or network. You will not want to be rejected based off of how you treated them or someone that is connected to that particular person. 

There is always more to a person than what we can see or hear, keep that in mind. 

Be Blessed,

Mrs. N.B.S

Personal Vs. Professional Relationships

If you have valuable connections within your network then you need to be in constant communication them. Your network does not have to be large for it to be valuable, often times the best connections are unexpected and small. How do you know that you have a valuable network? It's when you don't have to ask repeatedly for support. 

Negative Outcomes of reaching out to your network:

Hosting an event:

If you are one to host events often and your events play a major role in how you market your business but no one in your network shows, how are they valuable connection?

Selling or offering a product or service:

You suggest or ask for individuals to share your product even it they are not interested. If no one even shares the product or services that you have, then they are not a valuable connection?

Starting a new business or venture:

You request that your connections, give a advice, give suggestions, feedback or referrals. You could ask family or friends and receive little to absolutely no responses at all. Your family and friends are exactly just that. They are not apart of your networking circle.

Keep in mind that each example that I shared does not eliminate those individuals from becoming a valuable connection it just means that they are not a valuable connection at the moment.

As a professional in general, we must be able to understand that a personal relationship and a professional relationship are different. I'm learning that you can have a personal relationship with individuals and it can be merely just that. I've also learned that if you have a professional relationship with the people who you are connected with then there is a certain level of respect given. When you have a personal and professional relationship with people that you are connected with, those people are your most valuable connections. You can accomplish so much with people when you have their respect and their friendship.

Be Blessed,

Mrs. N.B.S

Preparation for a new start

The re-invention stage of developing your business and brand is overwhelming at times. Honestly, I understand how hard it can be to place yourself in a position within your business that is pleasing and fulfilling only to be disappointed with your results. Time and time again you hear people say, "don't give up or you are on the right track". Well, it's true and there is no excuse for you to give up on the one thing that will help you achieve the most important goal in this life, becoming what you were put on this earth to be.

Here are a few steps that I am using to stay motivated:

1. Setting a daily goal. I have to tell myself that it doesn't matter what time of the day it is, how late or how sleepy I am. I need to accomplish that goal each day. 

2. Weekly researching of other companies related to mine to determine how I can stand out and become more appealing to the public eye. Look for new marketing aims, I have to remind myself that it's better to make a mistake now rather than later.

3. Stay in communication with my contacts and resources weekly. Write down your results and asks mentors and those your connected to for advice on how to implement a strategic plan within your business.

4. Start investing more in others, whether showing interest and being more involved in their projects or business ventures as well. Sometimes it hard to make time for others because your more focused on elevating your own business. When you show interest it provides encouragement and confidence for them as well as yourself. 

5. Be consistent in everything that you do.

6. Be pleasant, kind and patient.

Best,

Creator and Founder, Miriam Dixon-Davis

N.B.S

The Writer's Experience- A Notebook Thought

At the moment, I'm focusing on the direction that I want to go in for my next book, Intolerable Boundaries, Part-2. I tend to doubt my lines in between writing each paragraph or wonder if the direction of the book will be relatable to my audience. Then I remember that it's my book, my vision, and interpretation of the world. I can only hope that it heart-warming, touching, appealing and over all that they are liked and loved by my readers. My desire is to become known as a writer with purpose; inspiring, heart grasping and depicting hope. I would be disappointed if there was no criticism.



-N.B.S
Writer & Creator, Miriam Dixon